16/07/2017

Right. Today has been absolutely and utterly shit. Work? Shit. Emotions? Shit. Love life? Non existent. Money? Shit. Flat? Shit. Everything has been so bad and I think it’s all been piling up for days and I’ve been trying to ignore how I feel because I know when I do address how I legitimately feel I cry and I break down and I hate being like that.

But, today, sadly that happened. I broke down. I cried, I sent sad snaps, I had a lil’ pity party for one. I listed everything that I’m not currently happy with in life and I got on with my shit. Its hard to be positive when everything just seems so awful and your emotions are getting the better of you buuuuuuut you have to just take a second to actually think and realise that life isn’t actually that bad and that you’re just listening to the bad and not paying any attention to the good that’s going on in your life.

So as I sit here on the evening of one of the worst nights of my year so far, drinking a beer listening to the cheesiest music I can find currently Peter Andre, Mysterious Girl… have I gone too far? I have to acknowledge my life is actually pretty fucking alright (soz mum if you ever read this and see I swore hahaha) and I’ve got it decent. Sure there’s things I’m not 100% on and theres areas of my life I wanna improve BUT that doesn’t mean I’m a failure or that my current life is shitty and I think I need to recognise that more often and stop being so goddamn hard on myself.

I’m not perfect. I never will be. But I can be happy, and I will be.

If anyone reading this needs cheering up, here’s the cheesy playlist that helped me lift my mood, I’d also recommend a beer and watch an episode of love island you’ll be better in no time, I promise. ❤️

Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/spotify/playlist/37i9dQZF1DX7pykHKVxv6o

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